On September 7th of last year my husband, Bill, collapsed on the side of a mountain road with what would later be diagnosed as a ruptured brain aneurysm. On September 9th our daughter, Pam, and I made the gut-wrenching decision to discontinue all life-support and two hours later my beloved was gone.
Five months have passed since my life was turned upside-down and inside-out. During that time I have not written on my blog. I chose today to start writing again, because February 21st is Bill’s birthday. He would have been 70 years old today. It seemed a perfect time to begin again. After all, there would never have been a blog or a novel had it not been for his constant support, guidance, direction and yes, sometimes, his nagging voice pushing me forward.
It’s not that I haven’t written anything since his death, it’s just not writing that is for public consumption. It’s journaling for my eyes only, for the purpose of working through my grief, because that’s what writers do. We write when our hearts are broken, we write when great joy fills our days, we write no matter what life throws at us. We grapple with life’s events, work our way through them, by writing.
So, I have a very short and simple message for today. I encourage you to try your hand at journaling. It’s a cathartic healing exercise which doesn’t require proper grammar or spelling or any sort of logical progression of thought. It’s just your mind moving a pen in your hand across a piece of paper and releasing thoughts and emotions onto the page. Try writing three or four pages without stopping. You’ll be amazed at what comes pouring out.
Although I am committed to writing on my blog on a more regular basis, there may be a shift in focus as I work my way through this journey of grief and healing. Stay tuned.